Sunday, November 29, 2009

I think,

Blogs should be kept private. Just to vent out your feelings.
You shouldn't show the WHOLE WORLD your blog.
Just like how if my parents found my blog, I'd be screwed. LOL.

I realized a lot today.
I fall for the super nice guys, they don't necessarily have to be amazingly cute.
Once I fall for them, they immediately turn that kind of cute.
But then again, I've only got one guy in my heart &it'll stay that way for awhile.
I started thinking about all the possibilities who "we" can be.
Trust me, there's a lot. So that got me thinking about my past for a couple of hours.
Especially since you joined that particular group too, I'm pretty sure you had the thought of me & you on your mind.
You never gave me that teddy bear you got me for Christmas last year.
If I had it, I'd be hugging & staring at it every single day. But no you never gave me it HAHA. So it's probably still in your room, who knows what you're doing to it everyday.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

I am dying of boredom,

so I will write about you.

I love talking about you,
You have no idea how happy I get when I have a chance to just talk about you.
So on Friday I hesitated about giving you a hug. &I regret doing that.
The way you said bye to me, I felt guilty not giving you a hug. You deserved one.
From now on I'm not gonna hesitate &think, I'm just gonna DO IT.
I was hanging around the quad, away from the movie place (We were watching Up @AHS)
My mind kept telling me to go over there and sit next to him but NO it took me like a hour to finally gather up my courage &go.
He was so cuteeee. If only I had told him I was freezing. If only he put his arms around me. Gotta stop the "if only"s (:

It's those rare I'll-never-find-those-anywhere-else hugs you'd give me, the ones that warms me up &leaves me feeling all cuddly inside.
& the time where you cried because of some mistake I made &some little misunderstanding.
& all those late night conversations we'd used to have before music camp back in 2008 ;D
& how you'd tell your friends about me before I even met them; now all you tell them is nothing.
& those enigmatic smiles that always ends up on your face whenever you're around me ♥
& times when we're alone, just me&you. like the time @Disneyland where I asked you to Sadies :) they weren't lying when they said Disneyland was the happiest place on Earth; other than your arms of course.
& your super sweet text messages that make my heart flutter ; reassuring me that you care (:

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Thinking of you makes me wonder if you're thinking of me too.

I've waited too long. There's only a certain amount of time a person can wait. I'm not willing to wait forever.

I know deep down inside, you still feel the same. &I'm sure.
But you're the guy &I'm the girl. I can't do much about us.

I can't help but get jealous.
Sometimes, well most of the time, it's for the most ridiculous reasons.

It's been 1 year & 5 months already. I never knew I would've lasted.

There's always that one high school sweetheart that you simply can't let go or get over.
In middle school, they were all just "little crushes" that didn't mean much even if you thought that "one special person" meant your whole world. Once you enter high school, it's different.
There comes the stage of loving with pain. That means crying over the one you love, staying strong throughout all the different times, dealing with a broken heart.

I love you :')

I can't wait for April 15-18th. The picture up there is SAN FRAN♥ That's where Orchestra's heading to during those dates. It won't be as fun without you there though

Friday, November 6, 2009

Behind the eyeliner and the hot straightened hair, there’s one little place that says: Handle with care.

I feel like all I can do is make people sad.
&I don't know why.

He's sick, with a high fever. Swine Flu? I hope he gets better soon. It's not the same without him there at school. Nothing's ever the same.
I'm so excited for Spring Tour on April 15-18th ;D
It's gonna be the best 4 days ever (:
But he's not in Orchestra anymore ; it won't be as fun without him.
Nobody to go to when I'm cold, nobody to hold hands with, nobody to dance with, nobody to run to when I'm scared, nobody to feel safe around. Just someone to call, hundreds of miles away.